I don't want to be a sexy bee

I don't want to be a sexy bee

Halloween is one of my favorite times of year. I can wear ridiculous costumes that get me the Stink Eye most days, like silly hats and boy drag. It's also the time of year for some of my favorite things! Horror movies, pumpkin spice, haunted houses, October beers, candy galore, popcorn balls... the list goes on forever.

But one thing gets under my skin, that tired old fembot rant: sexy Halloween costumes. I have no problem with the costumes themselves. If you want to doll it up for Halloween, then good for you! My friends love getting sexy Halloween costumes, and their pictures look pretty adorable.

My problem is that sexy costumes seem to be the only option for women when you go into costume shops. My costume idea was DJ Lance Rock from Yo Gabba Gabba, but the costume was not made to fit a lady's body, especially since the only sizes any of the shops seemed to carry was Large or XL. I looked into DIY-ing it, but the cost was outside of my budget. Thankfully, I found another costume at Goodwill that didn't bust my budget, but I'm still a little bummed about the experience.

While at the costume shop, I looked for alternate ideas in the ladies section. Hmmm, I could be a sexy bee, a sexy cop, a sexy border patrol officer (no shit), Ana Rexia (double no shit), or a plethora of other options that didn't work so well for a chilly night of Halloween debachery. Dude, all I want is a costume that isn't going to make me freeze and covers more than my Rocky Horror Picture Show costumes. (and jeez, half of my Rocky costumes are less revealing than some of the costumes I saw.) So for the past 20-odd Halloweens, I've DIY-ed it or dressed like a guy.

I'm not out to be the Puritan Police and legislate Halloween. If you want to be a sexy bee girl, then go for it! I'm just curious where the options are for people who want to be a not-so-sexy bee girl.