One from the Vaults: Nothing But Trouble

One from the Vaults: Nothing But Trouble

When I lived with my mom, she loved to scour the discount DVD bins at local grocery stores and buy movies based on interesting covers. This is how as a wee teenager I discovered the delightfully weird clusterfuck that is Nothing But Trouble. I don't think I could come up with a better summary than my husband, who said that it was "a cross between Cars and the Rocky Horror Picture Show." But here's a shot, at least.

Chevy Chase is some kind of smarmy financial writer, and Demi Moore is a lawyer. Because Demi Moore is hot, she talks Chevy Chase into driving her to Atlantic City along with two of his clients he dubs the Brazilianaires. All this back story is mostly a MacGuffin and doesn't matter too much to the plot, except that it's fun to say Brazilianaires.

A speeding ticket lands them in the Night Court of the Damned, as an ancient, sadistic Dan Akroyd makes them hot dogs before trying to kill them on a roller coaster that player the Damned Yankees. Then things get weird. Bonus points for an impromptu Digital Underground concert.

I suppose it's hard for me to objectively review this one, because it's a movie I've seen several times and love to pieces. It's dark, it's both consciously and inadvertently funny, its set design is mind-fuggling, and it's one of two movies based on Centralia, PA. Plus Demi Moore is oddly hot in her... hot pants business jumpsuit? (Yeah, you come up with a better description. Here's a picture.)

If you want a different opinion, check out Rotten Tomatoes, where the flick averages 11%. About the only ungushy thing I can say is that you can definitely tell at times that Dan Akroyd wrote the movie, particularly with the awkward pacing that some of the actors use. But mostly, I can just echo the sentiments of an IMDB forum member who said, "Someday when I'm rich, I'm going to have a pickle-shooting condiment train."

Trust me, you won't know what you're watching. Even with repeat viewings, you'll never know what the hell is going on. But at the very least, you can walk away saying you saw Tupac's film debut.

Buy Nothing But Trouble on Amazon